This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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