so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA