I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Randomize
