she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Randomize
