fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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