It was confusing and full of hummus
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
