Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
‪He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life‬
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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