Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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