Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
