i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
