Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
As shirtless as possible
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
