am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday