There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
