I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize