Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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