good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
As shirtless as possible
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
