when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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