PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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