I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
only you would photoshop your dick
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
