actually, I'm a sock model
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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