Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
