Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Its about making memories worth repressing
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
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