I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
