is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize