At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize