Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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