I need help removing her.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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