Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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