I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
