Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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