it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
