Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
Tornado booty call.. dedication
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
