Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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