i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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