he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
