We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Randomize
