I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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