I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
another moral hangover. fuck.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize