Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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