Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
