I'm sorry my penis didn't work
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
