thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
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Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
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sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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