listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
