so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Randomize