He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize