You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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