Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
