how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
