Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
