i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
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i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
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YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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