I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Randomize
