I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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