bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
